Thoughts on Mrs

I was shocked and saddened by the news of Mrs. Strassman's sudden death. She and Buddy have been an integral part of our JM family for many years. It is rare that someone can have a relationship with two families and have such devotion to both. In the Strassmans' case it is true. We were as devoted to her as her children and grandchildren. In turn she was as devoted to us as she was to her "real family". She attended the JM Family smachot, as many people did, and she also attend our annual family bar-b-que. She "shepped" such nachas from watching our growing families.

Mrs. Strassman was laid to rest on the 24th day of Shevat. For people who recite Tehilim every day, the reading on the 24th day of the month is the reading that coincides with the recitation of Hallel. As you know, Hallel is recited on days when we want to give thanks and praise to Hashem. It struck me that rather than mourn this great woman's death we should celebrate her life.

We should also take a lesson from the way she lead her life. She was a shining example of someone who gave of herself and never let it be a burden. She gave to us much more than the listeners could ever know. Last year we dedicated our marathon album to Mr. & Mrs. S. (See at right) This year we dedicate our entire marathon and fundraising effort to her.

I last saw Mrs. Strassman a few months ago, at the radio station. It was the day of our open house for "House of Today" donors, I believe. She gave me a hug and asked about Chani, and asked to see pictures of the kids. She oohed and aahed like a proud Bubby. To know Mrs. Strassman was not only to love her, but it was like having an extra Bubby. You can always use an extra one of those -- and if your extra Bubby was Mrs. Strassman, you were a lucky person indeed. WERE lucky. Past tense.

It's very hard to imagine what the marathon will be like this year. Our annual fundraiser has elements of a family reunion. Those two weeks see the whole JM in the AM "family" we like to talk about, getting together, and pulling together to reach our goal. It's hard work -- no matter how much fun we sound like we're having on the air -- and Hilda and Buddy Strassman were the matriarch and patriarch -- the couple who hold the whole family together. On the air, come March, I'd imagine we'll opt to celebrate her life, instead of simply mourning her loss -- but off the air, I have a feeling its going to be a sad occasion all around. I wonder if Mr. Strassman will be there. I hope so.

I have a strong mental image of the first time I met Mrs. Strassman. It was in the very first WFMU studio, in the basement of that dorm on the Upsala College Campus. I was a teenager -- I may have just gotten my driver's license, and I'd come with a friend who had a car. Mrs. Strassman was standing in the phone room smiling, offering everyone their choice from a box of Entenmanns doughnuts. The doughnuts were the precursor to the catered marathon feasts she was later to preside over. For a number of years before that, and every year since, when I walked into the marathon, there were Mr. and Mrs. Strassman. It wasn't easy for either of them to get up so early and schlep across New Jersey every weekday for two weeks. They did it, though -- because they knew it was important, and they knew they were making a contribution. But that

doesn't mean they wanted any credit for it. I'm sure she appreciated the thanks and the bouquets and even the dedication on the "Top Ten English Songs" cassette -- but she didn't want or ask for them. It was truly funny to see Mrs. Strassman recoil and flee when Nachum began to talk about her on the air or tried to lure her in the studio. I'll cherish the memory.

Mrs. Hilda Strassman was a selfless, lovely, loving woman -- and we'll all miss her, very much.

We were "the boys", as she lovingly called us. I think she really meant that we were "her boys". To me she was "Mrs S". I close my eyes. I'm walking into the old WFMU building on Springdale and heading straight for the kitchen where, for some ten years, her smile always awaited us. I see her radiant face, her warmth enveloping and energizing me. Not an easy task - to energize me, ever, let alone at 6 AM (or earlier), having already been up and on the road for a few hours. But her smile, her hug, her kiss, her love, her warmth were so strong, so real, so genuine they made you feel like you just got back from a two week vacation in the sun.

Mayer Fertig described it like having an extra bubby. Exactly! She had so much love for us "the boys" that it took six of us to love her back and at the end of the day I still think we never came close. No matter how much we tried to thank her, she always shied away. She didn't want publicity. WOW ! At a radio station - I can't think of a more publicity oriented place - she volunteered her time and energy at a radio station - yet never once did she want to go on the air, never once did she allow us to mention her name on the air. When we did - she got upset.

"Genuine Good" I think that can describe her. I thought I knew her. At her funeral I found out two things. That I did, and that I didn't. I did - she was the embodiment of "good" of chesed - loving kindness. That's how I knew her and that's how everyone described her. And yet, I didn't know to what extent. I didn't know how much of her life she dedicated to helping others. Unselfishly. Constantly. Chesed. Just plain Chesed.

It pains me that I don't have the verbal and writing tools to convey how much she meant to us and how much we miss her. The prophet Micha tells us what Gd wants of us in this world: To do justice, acts of loving kindness and to walk humbly before Gd. There's a big welcoming party up there for her.